I confess an affinity for books that collect insults, irony and verbal sparring.
Many years ago I was gifted with such a book, “The Portable Curmudgeon”, by a slightly demented step-child and her then fiance de jour.
For its genre that volume reigned supreme in my library until this Christmas morn.
Joey and Casey, son and daughter-in-law, presented me with the new leader of the pack, “The Snark Bible” by Lawrence Dorfman.
It has been said that wisdom and insight can be gained by opening any book at random and reading whatever is printed on that page. I did this and was amazed at how well the passage summed up my personal feelings.
I will now share the result of my first foray into the pages of the book.
“When you are annoying me, I’ll let you know it. I think of it as community service, not as being mean. Because otherwise you’ll just keep on doing it – your quirks, peculiarities, mannerisms, and traits, which may be cute to your mom but aren’t – and quickly everyone you know will be avoiding you like the swine flu. By nipping it in the bud, I’m preventing you from horrifying the entire world with your lack of style, taste, and personality, hence the “service” aspect of my advice. Don’t try to convince yourself that it’s me. Listen to what I’m saying and change.”
Have a New Year, as happy or crappy as you choose it to be.